Please share with a friend:

My Vacation Lady found this article in one of our blog posts from 2007— yes, that is how long we’ve been writing them!  I have said many times that I would love it if I never had to deal with airlines again. It would make my life much easier. (AND EVEN MORE TRUE IN 2015!!!)

We found some of  these in an article printed in 2007 in Travel Weekly’s magazine   (not even sure it was an e-zine back then 🙂 and from the Dauntless Jaunter and added a few of our own.

Again, this is all in jest, but we can all use a good chuckle now and then.

  • Open Jaw– what clients do when they hear what their full fare coach tickets will cost.
  • Air fare (the mathematics of)- the price of an airline ticket that can  change so fast that they can’t be measured.
  • Direct flight– either a connecting flight in disguise or what normal folk think is a non stop.
  • In snack flight– a bag of something sealed so well that you need a chain saw to open it.
  • Baggage carousel– otherwise known as the Bermuda triangle.
  • Code share– a trick where several different airlines have a plane at the same gate at the same time.
  • 737- The airline industry’s response to the overwhelming desire for more passengers to sit in the middle seat.
  • Commuter jet- this is a 737 before it grows up or a school bus with wings on it.
  • Minimum connecting time– the time it takes for an Olympic class sprinter to get from one gate to another at top speed.
  • On time– a time that the airlines pad with about 30 minutes or so to keep their ratings higher.  This may be compared to the ETA (estimated time of arrival) vs. the ATA (actual time of arrival)
  • Blue Juice– the water in the toilets on the planes.
  • Crotch Watch – is what the flight attendants do prior to take off to make sure that all seat belts are on and fastened.  Also known as a Groin Scan

Hope these brought a smile to your face.

My Vacation Lady is an award winning travel agency in New Jersey.  Our goal is to provide our clients with a stressfree and seamless vacation or honeymoon and if we can make you smile even before your vacation– even better!